I have a friend. I will call her Sami in this communication. Sami is a British Pakistani Muslim in her late 30s. We have been friends for over 6 years. When I first met her, she was very interested in seeing the inside of our little church building. She had lived almost all her life just doors away from the church and always wondered about it.
Through the years I have visited in her home many times and gotten to know her extended family. She attended my Mums and Tots group with her sons, helped me with my Urdu, assisted in my reading classes, and taught me how to cook some Pakistani dishes. Sami has visited in my home several times. Her husband attended the men’s English conversation classes at our church. Her nephews and nieces came to our Holiday club and now attend our boys and girls clubs. I cried with her when she miscarried her baby girl and rejoiced with her when she later gave birth to a healthy baby girl. She has confided in me about personal problems.
Sami has asked questions about my beliefs. She has expressed on more than one occasion how much she appreciates our church and how we have helped her family. After a 3 week long illness, I realized I hadn’t spoken to Sami for quite a while, so I decided to text her to see how she was.
After some chit chat back and forth, to my surprise she confessed that because of all the recent negative media about Muslims she was keeping a distance! I quickly assured her that what bad Muslims do, does not affect my friendship and love for my Muslim friends and students. She was quite relieved. When I told her George said they missed her son at boys club, she admitted that she had intentionally kept him away from club to protect him from being discriminated against as a Muslim. I assured her that we are very intentional in our efforts to make our kids’ clubs a safe place where we respect each other and treat one another the way we ourselves want to be treated.
This was her response, “I know you guys are lovely, but it’s always in the back of our minds that maybe everyone thinks we are all the same as the monsters responsible for the atrocities in the world.”
Karen King (and George)
